Mother’s day is when?

Friends, this is a holiday that I have to google every single year. I never know when it falls.

Mother’s Day 2020 is no different. It wasn’t until I was trying to make plans that a friend of mine mentions: “not a good time, Beans. Mother’s Day is this weekend.”

So Mother’s Day is on May 10, 2020? Oh. OK.

I’m just going to go ahead and say it: I hate Mother’s Day.

I know that as a blissfully single mom of two boys, this may sound strange, but the Mother’s Day holiday is cloaked with sadness for me. This special day where I should be honored as a mother, just serves as a reminder of what I have lost.

While most mom’s prepare for the phone calls, Mother’s Day brunches and gifts, I, on the other hand would rather not receive any kind of acknowledgement of my motherhood. It just feels so empty when my mother is no longer here and can’t share with me the experiences of motherhood that ought to bind us.

The fact is, mothers such as myself tend to be forgotten in the shuffle. We’re the ones who, while motherhood is our greatest joy, we have to deal with the loss of our own mothers. Mother’s Day is not as happy when your mom is no longer here to share it with.

I can’t write a Mother’s Day card and send it to my mother. That hurts. Mother’s Day amplifies that pain.

Bean’s take? Keep the Mother’s Day Bible verses, text messages and Mother’s Day quotes. I really don’t want them.

This Mother’s Day 2020, much like them all, I’m trying to get through the day and forget that I’m missing not only a mother, but a grandmother.

Mother’s Day is when? I don’t know and I don’t care. I’m just trying to cope with loss.

If you feel me and are missing a mother on this Mother’s Day, please drop a note. Let’s uplift one another.

Until next time friends.

Blissfully Single and Yours,